This is actually an ongoing choice, and I’m glad whenever I’m forced to make it; it’s a choice that changes my life the same wonderful way each time.
It’s the choice to let go of what I think I’m supposed to be, and to just be the best version of what I am. Continue reading
The offspring of doubt is motionlessness.
And by that I don’t mean peaceful stillness, but anxious paralysis watching progress being stifled.
Doubt’s parents are perfection and certainty. Continue reading
If you could ask the Earth to tell you about itself, what would it describe?
Would it mention oceans? Mountains? Trees? Bugs? Lava? Microbes? Atoms?
Could there ever be an end to the describing, when you’d know all there is to know? Continue reading
The full potential of positive thought depends on whether or not you believe in magic. But we’ll get back to that.
People really aren’t that complicated. What you tend to focus on and talk about sets the general course for the direction you’re going. Continue reading
A friend and I were walking back to my house once after school.
Some kids started harassing my friend, laughing at him, and just trying to get a rise.
My friend turned to me and asked, “Why don’t people like me?” But there was no emotion in his voice. His tone was quizzical and curious. He wasn’t upset, but genuinely interested. Continue reading
I think it’s important to realize you don’t hate yourself. If you did, you wouldn’t want to fix it. You’d be happy to see yourself hurt, failing, hopeless, rejected…
You might be really concerned about yourself.
Chances are you’re fixated on your [potential] flaws, and don’t generally see yourself as being any good. Specifics like your appearance, ways, voice, etc. might make you cringe whenever you notice them. Continue reading
Once Rocky wins the title (in Rocky II), he finds out his trainer has been fixing easy fights to keep him safe.
He then loses the championship, his trainer dies, and he’s left completely broken and filled with self-doubt. Continue reading
You might sense an insurmountable gap between your inner world (with all its potential) and what others can currently understand or appreciate of it.
But the second half of knowing, thinking, and being (as a person) is learning to communicate; otherwise any treasures you find within yourself stay locked up and unknown. Continue reading
It might help to look at different motivations people have for wanting to be moral.
There seem to be two basic camps:
Some feel they should be moral in order to meet some given standard or ideal. To these, morality becomes a black-and-white list of rules that spell out which behaviors are acceptable and which deserve shame or judgment. Continue reading
You’re lost if you’re not making forward progress.
In the show, Lost, a bunch of individuals were stuck on an island until each could overcome whatever was specifically holding them back from moving on.
Forward progress means building and bringing your unique value(s). Continue reading
I’ve felt that way at times: as though I’ve wasted my best, most precious years.
I’ve watched friends and loved ones move forward in ways I can’t even understand. It’s as if they’ve all got something figured out I don’t; and I’m stuck spinning, going nowhere, getting older… Continue reading
Here are 3 steps for how to deal with overwhelming emotions in the moment, and how to properly express yourself at the right time.
It might seem cheesy that each step starts with ‘A’, but it just worked out that way; hopefully that makes them easier to remember : ) Continue reading
There was an old Batman episode where Batman meets Clayface, a former actor with the power to assume any shape or identity he chooses.
During their showdown at the end, Clayface is surrounded by screens showing all the roles he once played as an actor. He can’t help but reflexively become each one he sees, frantically flashing from one to the next. Continue reading
Change your perspective on your own potential and on the people in your life.
Learn to focus on potential instead of whatever’s keeping you from it. Continue reading
The whole world isn’t really against you; but important people in your world might be, perhaps by not affirming or supporting you in a direction you want to go.
Here are 2 steps of not reacting (how to do nothing): Continue reading
Do we choose our identity? Our passions? Our talents?
What about our circumstances?
Consider a choice that seemed to really impact your life; where exactly did willpower or preference come into play? Continue reading
Confidence comes from self-esteem and self-efficacy.
Low self-esteem shows up as thoughts like:
Everyone’s about to see I’m not _____________ enough. Could I be any uglier, more clueless or awkward, worse to look at or listen to…?
Be careful when you come face to face with things you don’t like about yourself. Continue reading
There’s something in Psychology called the Ideal Self. It’s basically an image in your mind of the person you think you’re supposed to be.
Your Ideal Self speaks to you through the voice of your conscience. I say “voice” because its tone is never one of discussion or compromise. Your Ideal Self sits an infinite distance above, thundering down black-and-white judgments about all the ways you see yourself falling short of perfection. Continue reading
Society isn’t really that big on uniqueness. Yes, it claims to be; but really what it offers via culture and opportunity are prepackaged molds to fit and find success in (if you can).
Since we’re all always shown what success has to look like, we’re all busy searching for the best ways we can fit.
Those that realize they’ll never fit are artists. No, I’m not talking about painters or sculptors; throughout history, artists have shaped our world and ideals in powerful ways simply by being true to their individual selves and perspectives. Continue reading
It’s important to understand the difference between being assertive and aggressive.
Assertiveness isn’t a personality type, while aggressiveness is. Aggressive people are task-oriented extroverts; they’re energized by interacting with others, but what they care about are outcomes and bottom lines. That’s how they can be so fired up, blunt, and forceful, using intimidation to bend all circumstances to their whim.
Being assertive simply means being free to honestly present yourself and your thoughts exactly as you choose to. Continue reading