How can I properly express my feelings without letting my emotions get the best of me?

Here are 3 steps for how to deal with overwhelming emotions in the moment, and how to properly express yourself at the right time.

It might seem cheesy that each step starts with ‘A’, but it just worked out that way; hopefully that makes them easier to remember : )


I think we’ve all experienced opening our mouths to say something heated, but then feeling that “red light” sensation on the inside.

That’s a warning. Listen to it.

I know all you want to do is react; but how you wish you could force the moment to play out is really at the core of those unpleasant feelings that overwhelm and get the best of you.

Not blurting out frustrations and desires definitely requires maturity and perspective about what’s best in the long run. So step outside that bubble of urgency (in the moment) and see your own big picture of what you really want (in life).


Your big picture is painted by your deepest intuitions.

Find a way to capture those intuitions so they don’t get swept up in swells of further tumult, or buried in the conscious justifications you use [unconsciously] to live with everything unacceptable about your current state.

Practice seeing what you really want for long enough, and then no sudden upsets will be able to undermine or interfere.

That, by the way, is when you’ll have the maturity/perspective to do what you know you should instead of what the moment demands.


Show, don’t tell. Be, don’t explain.

As perspective makes not living by your convictions less and less possible, you’ll start to detach from all momentary outcomes.

Emotions will still rise and fall, but you’ll remain unaffected, no longer compelled to force anything.

You’ll know you’re already living your own life, becoming the best version of yourself. And what else could really matter then?


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